Night of the Living Bitch Tits

His name was Zombie Robert Paulson. See also Zombie Machete, Zombie Alien, Zombie Dr. Zauis and more!

Teaser: Daft Punk's TRON score

Tron: Daft Punk Music Montage

Trailer Park Movies | Myspace Video

Smell Like a Monster

'80S Cartoon Concert Posters

Buzzfeed has a handful of fake concert posters inspired by '80s cartoons. Above is a poster for Silver Hawks, but there's art for Masters of the Universe, Voltron, MASK and Thundercats, too. 
Vaughn Bode would love these. Or maybe he'd hate them. Who knows?


Via the Hypno Pimp.

T-shirt of the Day

The Madness of Mission 6 is back at Threadless! I've been waiting for this art to come back into rotation for months.

T-shirt of the Day

"It's only a dream!"

Rare Star Trek Photos

Slightly Warped has a great collection of rare Star Trek photos posted. There are a lot of behind-the-scenes images, as well as promotional and marketing materials, ranging from the television show's first pilot all the way to the film series. Below are some of my favorites.

Hmmmm ... Yoda cake

Via.

Fan-made SCOTT PILGRIM Blu-Ray Case

Via Edgar Wright's blog. Level up!

Monster Cereals are 2010 Target Exclusives?!

Apparently there was a reason I had such a difficult time finding Monster Cereals: they're on sale exclusively at Target this year. It's possible this has been the case in previous years and I simply didn't notice the trend, but dealiciousmom.com had this to say about this year's availability:

Available for a limited time, Count Chocula, Boo Berry and Franken Berry have added spoonfuls of Spooky Fun to breakfasts for more than 40 years. Make sure to grab your boxes of Monster Cereals before they disappear for another year because once the boxes are gone – they are gone for good! Plus at only $1.99 a box this is a nice little way to bring back memories and create some new Halloween traditions in your house!

Count Chocula, Boo Berry and Franken Berry will only be available from September 26-October 31 at your local Target checkout aisle.

Robocop Schematics

Conan's Last Stand

T-shirt of the Day

"He's like a squashed octopus."

Marker of the Beast

Overheard at Diesel Sweeties:

So I said to typographic wonder and Danzig aficionado Chris Piascik a while back, "We need to make Satanic Sharpies! They're called The MARKER OF THE BEAST!"
And then he drew the most demonic logo and I got to work making the packaging, which you'll see tomorrow.
The markers will be up at the stroke of midnight on October 6, starting at $6.66 in boxes I'm customizing by hand. (and shipping next week) I tried to get enough, but quantities are limited.
See you in about 24 hours? 

I think it's fitting that the person holding the pen in the photo above is a  lefty.

Via the Hypno Pimp.

Star Wars Fight Posters

I like to imagine there's a Star Wars equivalent of Don King involved with these fights.

Dr. Who LIVE tour in UK starts this week

American Dr. Who fans are a patient lot. It's not like we have much choice, mind you ... on the best of days we're a year behind British fans when it comes to access to new Dr. Who stories. On the worst? Fans in the 1970s were left to the whims of PBS scheduling, which was fairly erratic.

It hasn't always been easy for Dr. Who fans in the UK, either, with the situation ranging from feast to famine. The nation's present Dr. Who status is clearly "feast," though, as a new stage show called Dr. Who Live is set to begin Oct. 8 and will tour until next month.

Even better, Dr. Who Live features Nigel Planer (Neil of the Young Ones!)

From The Daily Mail:

Created by Dr Who executive ­producer and writer Steven Moffat, it kicks off in ­London next week. ‘It’s everything I wanted since I was 11,’ says Moffat. ‘A live show with the coolest Doctor Who monsters, a proper story and new screen material for Matt Smith’s ­Doctor. I’ll probably attend every night!’

Audiences are warned to expect the ­unexpected. With Nigel Planer starring as a new character, ­Vorgensen — ‘the ­greatest ­showman in the galaxy’ — some of the best-loved ­monsters and most ­terrifying foes who have never ­managed to conquer the Time Lord make an appearance.

Via.

Die Hard Alien!

Most folks didn't notice, but the monster from Alien 3 was a very different kind of monster than seen in the previous films. Even though there doesn't seem to be a genetic relationship between the alien and its host (which is really just an incubator) the Alien 3 baddie was part cow/part alien because it was spawned from a steer.

Thus endeth the alien biology lesson. I mention it only as a segue into a feature over at The Rush which shows what the aliens might look like if spawned from everything from Tyler Durden to Robocop.

Check out the entire series here!

Zombie Zinfandel

Here's something I stumbled upon at World Market last weekend: Zombie Zin, a California zinfandel. I'm not much of a wine enthusiast but slap a drawing of a zombie on a product and you've got my undivided attention. Zombie Ice Cream, please!

Anyway, here's what folks who tried Chateau Diana Vineyards' Zombie Zin wine had to say about it. These reviews cover batches produced over several years.

"Zombie Zombie Zinfandel is a devilishly delicious wine bursting with dark cherry, white pepper and jammy characteristics - perfect for inspiring your undead tastebuds. At this price it's (literally) a no-brainer."

"Cheap, but not worth it. Watery and flat. Don't bother."

"We don’t have any ratings written down, but I don’t remember it being a stand out wine or a terrible wine.  It was a decent selection with a cute seasonal name."

"The color of this stuff is literally black blood red. Very pretty, very flattering. The aroma, very nice, very pleasant. Could I tell you what is in it? Well, grapes. I'm pretty sure there's grapes in there. Battery Acid? The enzymes from an electric eel, and I think perhaps a hefty dose of cayenne pepper, just for spite."

Build-A-Bear continues its conquest of the universe

Via StarWars.com

Star Wars fans - and friends of Star Wars fans - can now create their own Anakin Skywalker, Clone Captain Rex, Darth Vader, and Jedi Knight teddy bears, courtesy of Build-A-Bear Workshop!

Star Wars bear costumes are available with a bear or without, in case you'd like to try and suit up that old Ewok plush you've had stuffed up in the closet (a Jedi-robed Ewok? Hmmm....).

There's also the Slumber Style Scruffy Puppy decked out in Star Wars peejays if you prefer your cuddlables more down to earth!

See what Build-A-Bear has available.

Breakfast with Cap'n Crunch's Halloween Crunch

During my recent scouring of retail outlets for Monster Cereals (the first real sign that Halloween has arrived!) I came across boxes of Cap'n Crunch's Halloween Crunch. According to Mr. Breakfast, Halloween Crunch has been around since 2007, but I'd never noticed it on the shelves before last week. Out of curiosity I picked up a box to see how it compared to the greatness that is Count Choucula, Frankenberry and Boo Berry.

"Doctor, I think my cereal has an infection ..."

In all, it's not a bad breakfast. It doesn't taste much different from Cap'n Crunch's Crunch Berries but that's nothing to complain about. The box boasts that the cereal turns the milk green and that's mostly true. It's not the robust Slimer-from-Ghostbusters green that I might have hoped for, but it was still a sickly color. Even better, though, the crunchberries appear to change color in milk. The pinkish cereal bits slowly show dark green speckling, which is pretty disgusting in a fun way.

The back of the box also features clip art showing aspects of different kinds of monsters to let you build your own. I snapped a photo of the back of the box, opened it in Photoshop and made my own monster. You can see it below!

James Hance is a genius ...

... but don't take my word for it.

T-shirt of the Day

"We all float down here!"

Awesome JAWS event this weekend in Ohio

Tomorrow night the Cedar Lee Theatre, in Cleveland Heights, Ohio, is hosting cool-looking Jaws event. Not only will they be screening the movie on Saturday, Oct. 2, but a neighboring bar and restaurant will be serving the following items:

* Bloody Water shots at Parnell's Pu
* Special 'Shark Melt' sandwich at Melt all weekend
* Special appearance by JAWS himself, signing autographs for a donation of $1 (partial proceeds from the screening and sandwich will go towards the World Wildlife Fund)

Man ... I've always wanted to meet Jaws! I hear he's much nicer than Shatner.

Read  more at the Facebook invite.

Monster Serial: BLADE

Riddle me this: When is a horror movie not a horror movie?

More to the point, when is a horror movie a horror movie? The concept, from a cinematic point of view, has been fragmenting almost from the start, dating back at least to the moment when James Whale decided Frankenstein should be equal parts horror, science fiction and comedy.

By the 1950s the notion of a "horror movie" usually included aliens, giant bugs, x-ray vision and a host of other elements not traditionally associated with horror movies. Which brings me to Blade, the 1998 movie that launched the Marvel movie empire. Any movie about vampires should be a horror film, right? Then why is Blade almost always stocked in the "action" section of video stores?


The concept behind Blade doesn’t come across like compelling movie material. The 1998 film took a second-string comic book character whose popularity peaked in 1978*, merged the storyline with elements usually associated with martial arts flicks, and threw in a bit of Indiana Jones for flavor. This is the kind of film Joe Bob Briggs used to call an “outdoor movie,” which means it would have fit in fine between drive-in showings of The Texas Chainsaw Massacre and Porky’s.

What elevated the film above drive-in trash was its style, the director’s attention to visual elements and the charisma of its leading man. Sure, it had plot holes big enough to drive through, but it’s not like anyone goes to see a film like Blade to discover a deeper meaning in life.

Recap time: Wesley Snipes plays an angry vampire hunter on a mission against an international cabal of undead monsters. Along for the ride (and to provide exposition) is Whistler, played with surly glee by Kris Kristofferson. Both men are on personal missions to avenge the deaths of family members by vampires, and seem almost apathetic to human suffering. The only thing that qualifies these men for good-guy status is that the bad guys are so much worse.
The movie begins in the middle of Blade’s war, kicking off with a very literal blood bath in a vampire nightclub. When one of Blade’s undead victims is mistakenly taken to a hospital, a young doctor (played by N’Bushe Wright, who's great here in what would usually be an unrewarding role) is dragged into the conflict. Through her eyes we get a look at Blade’s nightly combat sessions and learn that there is something bigger on the horizon that even the heroes can’t anticipate.

Stephen Dorff plays Deacon Frost, a “young” vampire (though exactly how young is never addressed) plotting a coup of his own against the vampire ruling council. Frost hopes to conjure a vampire blood-god to overthrow his elitist elders, and begin a reign of terror on the entire planet. Dorff’s subplot is sometimes more interesting than what happens in Wesley Snipes’ half of the movie, and could have stood alone as a separate film.

The action sequences are genuinely exciting, choreographed like a violent ballet. To accentuate the rhythm of the sequences (as well as draw attention to the dance-like fighting) is a heavy techno soundtrack which pushes the film along. If you’ve got a good sound system, remember to crank of the volume.
Snipes is also excellent and portrays the most dangerous anti-hero since Clint Eastwood’s “Man With No Name.” Director Stephen Norrington does an amazing job of establishing the bad guys in a matter of minutes, making them so rotten that anything Blade does to them, no matter how vicious, seems justified.



*And I say that with all due affection. I've been a fan of the character almost my whole life and was one of those people who got excited about the prospects of a Blade film back in 1989 when it was first announced in the pages of Comics Scene.

T-shirt of the Day

"I have such sites to show you. If only I can get this last side done."

Cap'n Crunch is a Werewolf

It's official: Halloween is upon us.

Some mark the holiday's start as the time Halloween costumes and candy first appear on store shelves, which is a practice I respect but don't follow. Every year Christmas pushes just a little closer to summer, consequently shoving the rest of the holidays earlier into the year with it. I saw my first Halloween products on shelves in early September and that's just too damn early.

For me, Halloween now begins when Monster Cereals emerge from hibernation. And that day was today.

I've been looking for them for the better part of a week without luck, but expanded my hunting grounds into the next state today (that's North Carolina, for those of you keeping score.) My first few stops were a bust, but I finally found them for sale at Target where they were proudly displayed on an endcap at the registers (see the photo above.)

I miss the days when you could get Monster Cereals year round, but apparently people only eat breakfast in the forms of bars and/or shakes these days. It's all very Jetsons but that's no excuse for not being able to get a bowl of Frankenberry in July.

But I shouldn't bitch too much. I fully expected to go another year without finding a box of Boo Berry, which is notorious for being the most elusive of the Monster Cereals. As you can see in the photo above, the Boo Berry crops must have been bountiful this year because there was plenty available. You'll also note they've redesigned the boxes (again) which is probably necessary because they're only produced once a year. (The boxes are also noticeably smaller than in the past.)

It seems that the monster bug is even spreading out into other cereals this year. Cap'n Crunch appears to have succumbed to lycanthropy on the front of the new Halloween Crunch cereal (which turns your milk green!) I like to imagine the good cap'n is trolling the waters of the English Channel with an entire ship full of werewolf pirates, laying waste to those who cross his path.

The Droid You're Looking For (but probably can't afford)

Motorola has unveiled its limited edition R2-D2 Droid 2 phone, and it's killer.
You can find the full details here. Here are the abbreviated specs.

* BLUETOOTH v2.1+ EDR
* 5.0MP camera with auto focus, touch–to–focus, and face detection, panoramic modes, and more.* DVD–D1 Video capture with easy upload to YouTube, slow–motion capture, fast motion capture and more.
* DLNA Wireless sharing of photos, video, and music with other DLNA compatible devices (Server, Controller, Player, Upload and Download)
* Blockbuster Mobile Application for downloading full–length movies the same day they are available on DVD.
* Dedicated Camera Key
* 3G Mobile Hotspot with support for up to 5 Devices
 * Custom, authentic Lucas Films R2–D2 designed Droid 2
* Exclusive "The Best of R2–D2" movie with Original Cantina Music
* Exclusive Empire Strikes Back Binoculars App
* Star Wars Live Wallpapers: Millennium Falcon and Space Slug
* Star Wars Interactive Wallpapers
* TI OMAP 1GHz processor with Dedicated GPU
* 8GB Internal memory for emails, texts, and apps
* 8GB pre–installed microSDcard for music, videos, and pictures (expandable to 32GB)
* Android 2.2 (Froyo) OS with Motorola Application Platform
* Integrated Google , Exchange, Facebook, Myspace, and Twitter Contacts
* Usage Time: Up to 575 minutes OR
* Standby Time: Up to 315 hours
* SAR: Head: 1.49 W/kg; Body: 1.50 W/Kg
* Battery: 1400 mAH Li–Ion

Sadly, in order to qualify for the $249 "online price" you have to sign a two-year contract. I've got more than a year left on my contract so old R2 here will be obsolete by the I have to re-up. You'd think these contract issues would be structured in a way that would, you know, encourage people to buy new products instead of creating unnecessary obstacles.